January 6 Be a Friend

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NIV)
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.

Proverbs 17:17   A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Do you have a lot of friends? Are they true friends? What is a true friend? Isn’t that someone who will be there in the difficult times? Someone who has seen you at your worst and not run away? Someone who knows you, warts and all.

In Ecclesiastes, Solomon tells us that we are better off with a friend. He tells us of the synergy that comes from working with someone else. There is also protection and profit in a partnership. God told us “it is not good for man to be alone. God always knows best.

Almost everyone wants good friends but not everyone knows how to find them. Zig Ziglar offered the secret! He said “when you go out looking for friends you can’t find them anywhere. When you go out looking to be a friend, you will find them everywhere!” What do you do? How do you go out to be a friend? By thinking of others.

In John 15:12, Jesus says “ My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” Does he mean I actually have to die to gain a friend? Nah! But it does mean that you have to put the needs of others first many times. You have to die to self. Do you call people you haven’t spoken to in a while or do you always wait for them to call you? Do you remember the birthday of others? Do you send cards or e mails just because? Do you follow up with others who have had some challenges in their lives? Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down his life for his friend.

Our first foster son did not want to make any friends when he came to live with us. He had been through the pain of making friends and then losing them when he moved. He could not understand that it was possible to maintain friendships over many years. I explained that I have been friends with (Uncle) Carmen for 58 years. That does not happen by accident. It takes work. Carmen and family moved several times. Our parents had to transport us many days. But we worked at that friendship and held it together to this day. One time when I called Carmen, he picked up the receiver before it rang and was shocked to hear my voice. He was getting ready to call me. We are kindred spirits who have shared agape love for more than half a century. It is even hard for me to fathom.

So, are you happy with the friends you have? Are they with you in the good times and the bad? Are you with them when they need you? How do they make you feel? Do you bring out the best in each other? Can you say “I like me best when I am with you.”? Go out today intending to shine God’s light and BE a friend. See who you attract!

One word of caution! This can be problematic. You can become resentful if you always put others first. You do need to have proper boundaries. Boundaries will help you establish guidelines for taking care of yourself. You cannot help others if your life is compromised. Ask God to help you establish these boundaries so you can be the person He designed you to be. Work in and through Him to be a friend to yourself and your family as well as to others you will meet. In Jesus name I pray! Amen!

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